America's Pasttime

Hoy es viernes, pues hoy es Game Time. Español, ever heard of it?

Last week, we had a game about Gumball Machines, and you were asked to improve upon the already wonderful concept. Here were some of your answers:

Tony said he wanted some hand sanitizers because gum ball machines are gross. We say poppycock. We also say nincompoop. Sometimes we say nanny-nanny-boo-boo.

Mitch Hedberg wanted a gumball machine that spits out smaller gumball machines. That would be awesome. But Mitch Hedberg is dead. So he can't win.

Then we had a good idea from DJ. He wanted to be able to choose your own color (and hence flavor) because you never want to get a gross purple one. Eew.

But the winner goes to Lorenzo with his answer: "Something that makes it taste like Bubble-yum and not gross stale gum." It was a close call, but if all the gum tastes like Bubble-yum, who cares what color it is. Not us. So congrats Lorenzo for winning last week's competition.

And now on to this week's game. Since we at the Pake Shlake Band are Washingtonians at heart and in reality, we have decided to play a round of the PSB Original Game, Headliners. Here's the news summary:

The Washington Nationals beat the New York Yankees 3-0 at Yankee Stadium to win the season series. Rookie pitcher Craig Stammen got his first Major League win for a team struggling to avoid becoming the worst team in the history of baseball. The Nats currently sit in last place in the majors but were able to win the series against the most successful American sports team in history. Third baseman Alex Rodriguez went 0-4 in the game to go hitless during the three game series, while National's counterpart Ryan Zimmerman was 3-5 in the win. The game was delayed over five hours due to torrential rains in New York. Coming into the series, the Yankees were 23-0 when allowing 3 or fewer runs. Washington ruined New York's perfect record, winning 3-2 on Wednesday and 3-0 yesterday.

As always, your job is to think of a funny/clever headline. Here's ours:

Delay Makes Pitcher show his Stammen-a

You're up. Let's see if you can hit a homerun with your headline. Or at least put an end to all the baseball analogies.