Hey hey, you you, I don’t like your Game Time. You don’t???
No way, no way, I think you need a new one. That’s not a bad idea.

Last Week’s Winner

Last Friday, we played a round of the PSB Original Game, Bests and Worsts, all about state songs. You had to come up with the worst songs about United States states and you didn’t disappoint point.

We heard everything from real songs about states (“Delaware”) to real songs not even remotely about states but for some reason adopted by states (“Hang On Sloopy”) to real songs with the titles twisted to sound like they’re about states (“You’re So Maine”) to songs by artists whose names sounds like states (Hannah Montana) to completely made up songs (“I Need to Know, so Alaska”).

That makes it kinda hard to pick the winner, so we have to dig a little deeper to find out the cream of the crop. You see, sometimes the cream doesn’t rise to the top, and you have to dig further down into the muck.

David submitted a youtube video to go along with his submission while Big A sent along the lyrics.

Sam submitted two responses, including runner-up “Deep in the Heart past the Aorta through the Coronary Artery of Texas”.

But the winner is… Sonny with the answer “Raise Up” by Petey Pablo, whose real name Sonny pointed out is Moses Barrett III.

How Moses turns into Petey, Barrett turns into Pablo, and a song about taking your shirt off in North Carolina turns into a Top 25 hit are all mysteries to us. But it earned Sonny a victory.

This Week’s Game

For those of you who don’t know, this Monday is Columbus Day. Observed. So, we thought we would dedicate this week’s Game Time to Christopher Columbus. Observed. We’re playing the PSB Original Game, Headliners, where this week your goal is to come up with a clever headline to the following article about Columbus. Observed.

On October 12th, Christopher Columbus and his crew landed in the New World. Sailing for King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella of Spain, Columbus took three ships, the Niña, the Pinta, and the Santa Maria, across the Atlantic Ocean in hopes of finding a water route to India. Columbus himself was convinced that he had in fact reached India, but it was clear that he had not. A newly unknown land has been discovered.

Your goal: To come up with a headline for this article. BUT, as we like to do with articles summarizing events from way back, you should write a headline that could have run in the time of Columbus. Observed. Here’s ours:

A couple days ago, Columbus sailed the ocean blue.

It doesn’t have quite the same ring, but I’m sure Gutenberg would print it. (Johannes, not Steve. Well, Steve would probably print it, too.) Anyway, post your headlines honoring Columbus in the comments. Observed.

The Time for the Game is now.

Last Week’s Winner

Last week, we played another round of the PSB Original Game, Little Known Facts. This time it was all about the United Nations, as we asked everybody to tell us a little known “fact” about the ol’ U.N. An example would be, “No one has ever referred to the United Nations as ‘the ol’ U.N.’”

But that’s just an example. Here were your answers.

Lorenzo and Luca talked too much about Tommy Lasorda. They lose.

Pep made a joke about D.C. United’s press releases. That’s funny. If you read D.C. United press releases. He loses.

Max said the ol’ U.N. would have given in to Dr. Evil’s terrorist demands. That little known fact is almost too-facty. At least, we believe they woulda done it. So he loses.

Joey Bag of Donuts might have won if he hadn’t first insulted Boutros Boutros, or as he as affectionately known, the ol B.B. But he did insult him, so Joey cannot win.
(It’s in the Little Known Facts official rulebook, right after you can’t mention Tommy Lasorda)

So who’s the winner? Is it Elizabeth or is it Tony?

It’s Tony with his Little Known Fact, “There are only 2 places in the United States of America where another flag can be flown above the U.S. Flag. One is U.N. Headquarters, the other is McDonald’s.”

So good for him. And good for Grimace.

This Week’s Game

So yesterday, Mike intentionally unintentionally offended West Virginia and Alabama by unintentionally intentionally praising the famous songs about them. He said something about the best songs and the worst states, and that naturally brought to mind the PSB Original Game Bests and Worsts.

So let’s play it. Play what? Bests and Worsts, of course. With this topic:

Worst song about a state.

Hmm… worst song about a state, eh? Lemme think here….Oooh

We Built Minnesota on Rock and Roll

See? The song does not have to be a REAL song, but it has to be like, KINDOFASONG. Anyway, it’s your turn to play. Come up with something song-related, state-related, or both, and post it in the comments.

What time be it? Game Time! Arrr!

Last Week’s Winner

It be our last meetin’ when we played the PSB Arrr-iginal Game, Bests and Worsts. We asked ye landlubbers ter come up with a fittin’ replacement for a hand, if ye be havin’ the misfortune of losin’ it. We be takin’ a look at yer lily-livered responses.

Firstly, we be wantin’ ter extend a shout-out ter all ye cockroachers who ended yer post with “Arrr” or some variant. It be pleasin’ ter the captains. Especially when in the rest of yer comments, there was nary a sign of pirate speak. We say ter ye, “Avast!”

Next, we be turnin’ ter Big A. His answer be scissors, and ’tis a fine choice. But, it still be a tad too sharp fer the likes of us, especially if we be havin’ an itch on the nose.

Tony be sayin’ a Wii remote would suffice. Aye, ’tis true, but batteries be scarce on the high seas. Even scarcer than Wii’s. So, nay, Tony shan’t be the winner.

But, we be decidin’ that the winner be…Pep! Arr, his choice of a fryin’ pan be just the thing ter fry a fish caught out on the briny, or ter smack the face of an intruder. And who among ye could turn down pancakes? Aye, Pep be the winner! Huzzah!

This Week’s Game

Unfortunately, this Saturday is not International Talk Like a Pirate Day. It’s not even International talk Like a Hispanic Day. However, the United Nations is holding a summit, and that at least has some international flair to it.

But in general, UN Summits are not the most interesting. For example, the UN Security Council just had a resolution to say nuclear weapons are bad. Snoozer! So, to liven things up, we’re going to play another round of the PSB Original Game, Little-Known Facts, the game where you make up something and pass it on as fact.

Give us a little-known fact about the United Nations.

Here’s ours:
The United Nations was incorrectly spelled the Untied Nations in the founding documents. The typo was not found until 1956 and it took two resolutions before the name was officially corrected.

Now it’s your turn. Remember, we have a loose interpretation of “fact” and of “quotation marks”.

Yo ho, yo ho, a Game Time’s life for me!

Last Week’s Winner

Soapy shirts were the subject of last week’s Game Time, where we asked you to come up with a clever slogan in the PSB Original Game Ad Geniuses. Let’s have a look at your marketing ideas.

Lorenzo’s slogan was: “The best thing to happen to Soap since that weird show with Billy Crystal.” that’s pretty funny, but in general you don’t want “weird” in your ad campaign, so he doesn’t win.

Sam returned this week for a pair of under the wire responses. The pitch “Soap shirts: Wrinkle-Free!” was clever, but we feel it doesn’t really sell the soapy aspect of it, which is a fair point.

So, the winner is Max, with his slogan: “Soap Shirts – Giving Dryclean a Whole New Meaning.” Ah, that’s the ticket. Well done, Max!

This Week’s Game

Arr, now we be turnin’ ter this week’s game. As Johnny a’ready been alertin’ ye, tomorrow be International Talk Like A Pirate Day. Aye, ’tis true. If ye be rememberin’, ’twas a year ago we played a rousin’ round of Game Time honorin’ the saltiest seadogs that ever sailed the Seven Seas. Aye, and today we be playin’ a pirate-themed PSB Original Game, Bests and Worsts. Here be yer topic:

Best thing to have in place of your hand.

Aye, most pirates be choosin’ a hook, but ‘taint no good use for a hook. Ye can’t answer yer iPhone and ye can’t flip pancakes! Nay, a hook be no good.

We say ye ought better ter have a spatula. Aye, ye can’t answer a phone, but you can flip pancakes, a swashbuckin’ treat on the high seas.

Now it be yer turn. Post yer scurvy comments, you landlubbin’ bilge rats!

Once upon a Game Time…

Last Week’s Winner

We played the PSB Original Game Bests and Worsts last week, where you had to think of the worst excuse for not doing your homework. We had a lot of bad excuses, but only one can win, so let’s take a look.

Mama Meg said she didn’t do her homework because she was working on the extra credit instead. Well, that’s pretty bad, but she is still doing schoolwork, so it could be worse.

Luca said he can’t start his homework until he finishes his summer reading. That’s a bad excuse, but he loses for the same reason as Meg. Schoolwork of any kind is frowned upon here at the Pake Shlake Band.

Lorenzo couldn’t complete his homework since he was honoring Michael Jackson’s passing. That is a bad excuse, but only because Michael Jackson died like a month ago. In general, a moment of silence to commemorate heroes is commendable. So, Lorenzo’s answer doesn’t win.

Now, without further ado, the winner is KJ! Yes, a newcomer to shlake.com wins for the answer, “No time for homework. Spent all week trying to come up with clever slogan for imaginary board game about horses.” Spending too much time on shlake.com instead of doing homework? That is, indeed, a horrible excuse. Congratulations, KJ!

This Week’s Game

Earlier in the week, Mike said that clothes should be made out of soap. Well, that sounds like a pretty dumb idea, but that’s never stopped Americans from buying into it anyway. All it needs is a clever ad campaign. So, we think it’s time for another edition of the PSB Original Game, Ad Geniuses.

Come up with an ad slogan for shirts made entirely out of soap.

Here’s our pitch:

Soap Shirts – With shirts like these, who needs deodorant?

OK, now it’s your turn. Post your ideas in the comments, and maybe you will be the brains behind the new biggest thing in fashion. But, don’t count on it.

G to the Ame, T to the Ime. Or mathematically speaking, G^ame T^ime.

Come on man, superscript it up.

G^ame T^ime

Now we’re talking.

Last Week’s Winner

Last week, we played another round of the PSB Original Game, Ad Geniuses, where we asked you to slogan up “A Wink and a Nod” a fictitious equine-themed board game. Let’s see how you did.

Loyal reader Sam had been posting a bunch of answers to our Game Time games on Thursday nights, sneaking in his answers right before the deadline, for several weeks in a row. After chastising him and denying him the victory, he didn’t play this week. And that’s what we at the Pake Shlake Band are all about – criticizing our readers so much, they never want to come back. You hear that you? You stink!

Instead of Sam, Tony and Luca were the loyal reader who decided to give us a whole bunch of answers – two a piece. But the best out of those four was Tony’s slogan, “The ‘Neighs’ Have It!” Not too shabby. But for all four of Tony and Luca’s answers, we have to say…nay.

Mama Meg had a good idea with her tagline, “Make Dollars out of Horse Sense,” but that seems too much like exploiting the beautiful creatures. And if there’s anything we don’t do to horses, it’s exploit them. Maybe if she had said, “Make Dollars out of Horse Cents,” that would have worked, but we’ve all seen that game already. It’s called Horsopoly. And it stinks.

Emily had quite possibly the best answer yet with “The Game for the Horse-Lover in All of Us – Or Some of You Weirdos at Least…Who Loves Horses Anyway? Third Grade Girls?” But that might be a little too hostile for any marketing, especially marketing to the third grade girls.

So it looks like Lorenzo comes in first again, earning himself back to back wins with his slogan, “Are you able in the stable?” That means Lorenzo is 2-2 in Ad Geniuses, which should probably earn him the title of Ad Genius. But it won’t.

This Week’s Game

So it looks like it’s school time again. Yep, it’s that time of year again, when schools open up their doors again and kids find themselves back on the yellow buses.

Now we know what you’re thinking: “BOOOOOO school!” or “YAAAAY school!” or “I’m kinda indifferent to the subject, but you were eerily correct in saying you know what I was thinking.”

So with back-to-school on our minds, we’re going to play a round of the PSB Original Game, Bests and Worsts. You know how to play right? It’s pretty easy. Here’s the topic:

Worst excuse for not turning in your homework.

And here’s our answer:

That episode of Top Cat where Al the Actor pretends to be Officer Dibble and steals all the paintings was on and you couldn’t resist watching it.

Whatchoo got?

When I say Hillshire you say Farm. Hillshire! Farm! Game Time!

Last Week’s Winner

Last week, we played a new game, an as-yet-unnamed game, about coming up with a slogan for the fictitious product, “Ironic Twist”. We had a bunch of answers, and now it’s time for us to pick them apart.

Sam for the third straight week gave us lots of answers close to the deadline, and for the third straight week, we at the Pake Shlake Band cannot reward such procrastination. Well for the second straight week at least. Looks like we did let him win for his Lowell inspired headline. But there was no Lowell to save him today – he loses!

Tony, Nick and Joey had some good answers, but instead of giving us the ad slogan, they gave us more of a commercial sometimes with narrator included. So we don’t think they should win. But maybe that could be another game. Come up with the best narrator to read the commercial of a fictitious product that you come up with. Kinda long name for a game.

Anyway, that leaves Lorenzo. Lorenzo should be thankful for the Process of Elimination. It made him our winner! (But his answer was good too.) Lorenzo said Ironic Twist is just plain tonic water, and the slogan is “Expecting something else? Why do you think we call it Ironic Twist?” Nice slogan, nice winner, nice process of elimination. Nice dog.

This Week’s Game

And now we’re going to keep the fun right where it belongs – in the advertising agency. The yet-to-be-named game has now taken upon a name of its own: Ad Geniuses. Or should we say the PSB Original Game Ad Geniuses? It’s not a PSB Original until we say PSB Original before it.

We’re gonna make it a little easier for you though. This time – and maybe from now on – we’ll give you the name of the fictitious product, and we’ll also explain what it is. All you have to do is come up with the slogan.

Here’s this week’s fictitious product:
A Wink and a Nod – a board game targeted at horse lovers

Ooh! Sounds like a fun game. Here’s our answer:

A Wink and a Nod: Blind Horse Not Included

Toccate.

Many a tear have to fall (do-do-do-do) but it’s all (do-do-do-do) in the Game Time.

Last Week’s Winner

We had a double dose of Headliners last week, where you the choice of two articles to create a headline for. One was about the passing of Les Paul, the other was about the passing of third-string quarterback Colt Brennan. Let’s review the responses.

Sam was again the midnight responder, submitting two answers. With respect to the Redskins article, he gave the headline: “Ravens to Redskins: Nevermore.” It was okay, but we thought it would have been more clever if it has said “Never score,” because that rhymes and the Redskins were in fact shut out. His “Les Paul: Guitar Hero” answer was very clever, and probably would have won, except we chastised him last week for his late responses, and we felt we couldn’t continue to reward his procrastination. At least not two weeks in a row. So, Sam loses on both counts.

Next, Tony gave the double answer, “Les Paul is dead, so are Redskins playoff hopes.” This was good, but we thought it couldn’t win, because what newspaper would put those two topics in the same article? the Washington Post hasn’t condensed that much. So, Tony loses.

Then who wins? Well, it’s Luca, for his response, “Les is No More.” Short and sweet. Except, not that sweet since it’s making light of someone’s death. But, that’s fine with us. Good work, Luca!

This Week’s Game

For this week’s game, we are going to change it up a bit. Earlier in the week, Mike pulled the ol’ ironic twist on us, and then mentioned that Ironic Twist is a good product name. So, here is this week’s game:

Come up with an advertising slogan for “Ironic Twist.”

Now, here is our ironic twist, the product “Ironic Twist” can be anything. That’s right, you get to decide what the product is and how to market it. How fun! Here’s our answer:

Ironic Twist: Scoop It, Twist It, Trash It. Who’s the Master? Ironic.

See? In this case, Ironic Twist was a pooper scooper. Your turn.

Take me out to the Game Time, take me out with the Shlake!

In out last Game Time, we played the PSB Original Game, Little-Known Facts, where you had to provide some knowledge knuggets about Paul McCartney. Let’s recap some of the best answers.

Joey Bag of Donuts told us about the song “Yesterday,” and while this was interesting, we feel it bordered to much on the truth side, seeing as it was, in fact, true. Nice try, Joey, but we prefer that our little-known facts are not so fact-like. Sorry!

Next DJ and Nick had similar ideas, and combining their answers with our original answer, you get the very little-known fact that Paul McCartney of Liverpool is really the Irish-American Ringo MacCartney from Omaha, Nebraska. Wow, bet you didn’t know that! But, since we don’t like giving dual awards, they don’t win.

Finally, we come to Sam. We had a great struggle with Sam. You see, we like people to respond early, and Sam waited until the last minute. But, we are glad to see people play. And, then he posted more than one answer, but, they were rather enjoyable. So, after much deliberation, we decided he should win, but get a reprimand. So, Sam wins for his fact: “Paul’s band Wings was named after the famous television sitcom about a New England airport.” Ah, yes, Lowell would be honored. Nice job, Sam. But, next time, we won’t be so generous, so shape up or ship out!

Now, for this week’s game. Let’s play another round of the PSB Original Game, Headliners. What do you say? Great. This week, we’ll do the ol’ two-for-one, where we’ll give you two stories, and you can give us a headline for either one.

Les Paul, commonly credited with the invention of the electric guitar, died yesterday at the age of 94. He is best known for the guitar that bears his name, but also for muti-track recording which revolutionalized the music industry. He was also a guitarist himself, playing with people from Bing Crosby to Louis Armstrong. His death was caused from complications from pneumonia.

The Washington Redskins played their first pre-season game of the year yesterday, losing to the Baltimore Ravens 23-0. The Redskins offense looked impotent, the defense ineffective, and perhaps the only thing more futile than the Redskins third-down defense was the Ravens red-zone offense, as Baltimore twice marched down the field only to settle for field goals. The starters from both teams were removed by the second quarter, rendering the rest of the game a glorified try-out for the last few roster spots, for which no Redskin made a serious claim. Third-string quarterback Colt Brennan, vying to become second-string quarterback, did not help his cause, completing only a third of his passes and throwing the only interception of the game.

Here’s our headline:
Redskins Lose Big; Pake Shlake Band Writes Scathing Recap

OK, now it’s your turn. Give us a headline to either of those recaps, and see if it’s your answer running in the papers next week. And by “running in the papers,” we mean shouted-out on shlake.com. Post your headlines!

It’s Friday, and that can only mean one thing. That’s right, folks, it’s Game Time!

Last week we played a game where we gave you a punchline to a joke, and you had to supply the set-up. The punchline, if you recall, was: “Because Dracula can’t flip pancakes!” Let’s take a look at some of the jokes that you created.

Luca asked this question, “Why does Frankenstein always have to make breakfast?” with the punchline being as above. We thought that was funny. But, it does not win.

Tony supplied us with a dialog joke, which we at the Pake Shlake Band are rather fond of, and we are always looking for funny and creative answers to our games. Tony’s answer was indeed creative. Unfortunately, it was not too funny. So he doesn’t win.

The winner is Mama Meg! We actually struggled a lot with this, since she sort of changed the punchline around. So we are going to fix her answer and give it to you right now!

Mike: When Dracula applied for a job at the local diner, why did he request the night shift?
Johnny: I don’t know, why?
Mike: Because Dracula can’t flip pancakes!
Johnny: Oh. I thought it was because he’s a vampire, and he will die if he sees the sun.
Mike: Well, I guess that’s another reason.
Johnny: Yeah, but if he works at a diner, don’t they make breakfast all day long? I mean, he might still have to flip pancakes.
Mike: Oh, that’s a good point. Maybe they have two cooks per shift.
Johnny: Maybe, but you don’t need two cooks for 3 AM, do you?
Mike: Yeah, probably not. I don’t think he’s gonna get hired then.
Johnny: Yeah, and being a vampire also probably makes it harder to get a job.
Mike: He could probably be a waiter though.
Johnny: I guess.

Wow, that’s a really funny one Mama Meg! Nicely done! Now, we turn our attention to this week’s game.

For those of you who don’t know, Paul McCartney has recently been on tour, and last Saturday he performed at FedEx Field, here is Washington, DC. (OK, technically it’s Landover, Maryland, not Washington, DC, but you get the idea.) So, for this week’s Game Time, we thought we would honor Sir Paul with an edition of the PSB Original Game, Little-Known Facts.

Give a little-known fact about Paul McCartney.

This is what we recently “found out” about Paul:

Paul McCartney was actually born in Omaha, Nebraska. His Liverpool accent is fake.

Wow, did you know that? Neither did we. Now it’s your turn to come up with your own little-known fact. Good luck!